Remember my summer goal? I haven’t exactly kept up. During a recent summer run I did, however, manage to assign a lot of blame.

1) The humidity

Running through soup is the worst. I almost died a little while back running in Park City; but honestly, I much prefer the cardiovascular agony of that experience to the feeling of swimming through hot, thick fluid while pounding the pavement. I would like the only tackiness on my skin during and post-run to be my very own sweat and not the atmosphere building up on my pores. Gross! Humidity ruins running for me.

2) My thighs

I know the blogosphere is rich with those who argue that thigh gap is an unnatural and unreasonable body goal. But when it’s hot and humid (see #1 above) running capris or layering shorts over compression garments is really not feasible due to the substantial overheating they cause. However, the absence of thigh gap in running shorts results in a burning from chafe that escalates throughout the run. And the thought of the tackiness of body glide to prevent it in the soup (see #1, again!)….ugh I can’t even imagine despite the fact that rubbing thighs make for a less than awesome run.

3) That barre class that I took

Speaking of thigh gap (see #2 above), the effort to make the hammies and the quads along with the sartorius, tensor fascia lata, and gracilis (that’s right these baby muscles I didn’t even know could hurt until I started barre) lean, long, and strong might eventually abate the kissing inner thighs. But, in current practice, running too soon after a barre class leads to quite of bit of muscular agony with each step. Don’t get me wrong, the muscle strengthening I have gained from barre has made me a better and stronger runner (and led to a wider set of summer beach wear options) but, ouch!, the soreness does distract from being able to enjoy the run.

4) The sun

Typically it’s bright sunshine that lures me out to run. I have dark skin. I don’t burn. But on a sunny summer day the sun is my enemy (perhaps not as much the humidity but still). Constantly looking up for a cloud, or tree, or building to cast a shadow and alleviate the fire raging in your skin definitely ruins a run.

5) My hate of mornings

I know I could have avoided some of this bitterness at the weather ruining my run had a simply gotten out there before the sun (see #4 above) became such a foe, lingering mid-sky cockily, an while the refreshing dew was still cooling the early dawn air.  But I suck at mornings and, despite my best efforts, runs after 7am are easier for me than runs before 7am. This time of year, though, the conditions are oppressive soon after 7 and I spend my run cursing myself for having slept in. Calling yourself bad names makes you feel like less of a badass runner.

6) My running partner

My husband is my go to running partner. Typically he keeps up with me or I keep up with him; we make a good pair with our matched 29 inch inseams. But evidently the humidity is less of a battle for him. He runs ahead of me and then waits, patiently, for me to catch up. This waiting part seems so smug to me. Maybe it’s just the humidity getting into my head but a this moment I want to both stop running immediately and divorce him and thinking about divorce tends to take away from the joy of running with your life mate.